New Year “Resolutions”

As 2018 ended and the entire cycle of the “NEW YEAR NEW ME” bullshit starts again, I also want to get into the trend followed since the time the calendars were published and January’s first day was declared as the official beginning of New Year… and New Year Resolutions started.  Let me share with you my ideas of New Year Resolutions; so let me begin:

I “shall” wake up early, be it winter or summer:

I wake up very late; my class starts at 9:30 AM. I wake up at 9:00 AM, and sometimes at 9:20 AM. I seriously don’t know how I make it to class a little late, so starting this year I “shall” begin to wake up early.

I “shall” finish my practical records on time:  

Last semester, I suffered a few days and in between the exams; not only me, but all boys of my class and the seniors. Now I realized the importance of completing the practical records on time.

I “shall” devote equal time to every activity:

You see, if I get engrossed in something then I do it. Its good, right? Except that I do just that thing and leave the other works, no matter how important that other things are be it studies or sport or any other activity.

I “shall” re-watch and read Lord Of The Rings completely: 

I am never satisfied no matter how many times I watch and read Lord of the Rings. This year I’m going on a Lord Of The Rings marathon.

I “shall” find a stable relationship:  

Yup, I shall try. Don’t keep up the hopes though.

I “shall” cut down on junk food:  

I consume a lot of noodles, which leads me to skipping meals. So I need to definitely gotta cut those down, and I shall.

At the end of the year, when you ask me about the results, the only thing that you would hear is that I failed spectacularly. Here’s why:

As far as waking up in the morning is concerned its not that I can’t wake up. I mean its not really hard, but the problem is, its freaking cold! And WHO THE HELL would want to wake up this early unless you are compelled to? Yes, in summer, I can wake up early, but the habits of Winter won’t leave me. So yeah, I have to apologize to my professors this time too.

Now coming to the topic of finishing my practical records on time; Well, I don’t think it will really fly. Maybe for a few classes it will go, but I can’t promise as the future is unknown, but I know I won’t be able to.

I can’t do the 3rd resolution. I don’t think I can. You can’t just turn a couch potato into fries, can you? Or tell a fish to breathe out of water can you? well there are fishes that can, but I don’t care. The point is not to ask something that is next to impossible.

I can get the movies. But the books? Sorry! Next time maybe, when I am filthy rich to be able to buy, maybe even the author J.R.R. Tolkien, if he were alive.

I believe that you have met people who can’t see beyond their smartphone and computer screens. Maybe you have even met people who are too dumb to understand subtle things. You might also have met people who have enjoyed their own company for so long that they don’t need the feel of a life partner anymore, even when the opposite sex takes a step forward to them. Now combine all of these traits and you discover a category called “Single but never ready to Mingle”. I am in that category, get it?

And junk food? I wonder how did I even write that.

So these are my New Year resolutions. I am pretty much sure that I won’t be following any of the above. I am sure that you also have made your New Year resolutions. My advice though, don’t follow them.

Just kidding. Give it all you have got.

Also, I want to tell you that no matter what time of the year it is, making resolutions is fine as long as you follow them. Make an effort. You might not be able to follow all of them, but if you are honest with yourself, that counts, and that feels good!

Also, I wish you at the beginning of this year… 12 months of success, 52 weeks of laughter, 365 days of fun, 8760 hours of joy, 5256000 minutes of good luck and 31536000 seconds of happiness!

Except for those who rape, torture, kill and imprison innocent families. Let’s refer to a certain Kim.

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